Some women want gold and diamonds. I like those too, but each new boyfriend won't let me wear what the ex bought me so I never get to keep wearing any jewelry.
You need to date men who are more secure. And why would a boyfriend ever be in a position to let you do anything?
Here is the version that I got. Back in the time of the Roman Empire, a male must serve in the military and honorably discharge before they are allowed to get married (I am not a Roman History buff, anyone want to verify this point?). However, there was a priest call Valentine who were caught marrying couples even though the guy never served in the Roman Legion. Worse, he also married CHRISTIAN couples. So, the Roman Emperor at that time arrested him, tortured him, and executed him.
As a result, Valentine was martyred and later sainted and Valentine's Day was established to remember his sacrfice. How this evolved into a day of spending a fortune and spoiling your girlfriend, I don't want to know...
No, THIS IS HOT.
In terms of that weight-watcher/ BMI thing, I am 6'' and 150lb. According to the BMI calculator, my BMI is 20.3 and I am normal.
The version I heard is WAY different... damn you, discovery kids.
Ether;46874 said:
Can anyone beat 18.6?
I really need to put on some weight..
I'm 17.2 which means I'm underweight, but only by 1.3 points so I think I'm good.
You need to date men who are more secure. And why would a boyfriend ever be in a position to let you do anything?
Phil
I call it respect. I respect that a new boyfriend doesn't like to see what the old boyfriend got me. We all feel that way, jealousy is normal. I respect how the new boy feels so, I chose to not wear those things. Much easier to just boil it down to "he doesn't let me" than to sound cheesey about "respecting how he feels and not wanting him to feel uncomfortable". I think I can show sensitivity to my partner's feelings by doing something not asked for, as a display of my appreciation of them. Do I really need to keep wearing the tokens given to me by previous men that "stated their love", not really. Besides, rings get in the way of gloves and I do a lot of lab work.
As for secure/insecure, I'll take insecure. Overly confident men turn me right off. That attitude of "I"m God's gift to you" is just, ugh. That perfectly balanced blend of jealous/not too jealous doesn't exist.
I call it respect. I respect that a new boyfriend doesn't like to see what the old boyfriend got me. We all feel that way, jealousy is normal. I respect how the new boy feels so, I chose to not wear those things.
Emphasis on boy.
Katt;46947 said:
As for secure/insecure, I'll take insecure. Overly confident men turn me right off. That attitude of "I"m God's gift to you" is just, ugh. That perfectly balanced blend of jealous/not too jealous doesn't exist.
There's a big difference between secure and cocky. My Queen can wear what she wants and hang out with whomever she wants. If she wants to wear jewelry a previous boyfriend gave her, I'm fine with that. I realize she's with me now, and that's all that matters.
Quite right! Most "men" under 30 are still boys, heck some are still boys after 30. For me, I do not view males as men until they have a career, perhaps a family, and perhaps some assets. Yes, that may not be the commonly accepted definition of man, but that is how I see it. A man should be able to take care of me, should I desire to be taken care of (if I can not work due to taking care of children).
PhilB;47063 said:
There's a big difference between secure and cocky. My Queen can wear what she wants and hang out with whomever she wants. If she wants to wear jewelry a previous boyfriend gave her, I'm fine with that. I realize she's with me now, and that's all that matters.
To each his own.
Phil
Your "Queen", eh? Sorry, that's just hysterical. It's funny that you feel like you have to size up to a person you haven't met. Males are so funny. Oh yes, you are sooo much better as a boyfriend because your "Queen" can do as she royally pleases! You are the MAN. :teeth:
Secure and cocky, yup two different things. Too bad most guys don't know the difference. I'm glad you're great to your girlfriend. Many guys haven't figured that out. Maybe you haven't been burnt by a cheating ex, maybe you have and have come out just fine. However some are pretty affected by that type of experience.
In the end, it's about being sensitive enough to your partner to not being over bearing (such as letting your Queen do what she wants), to not making your partner uncomfortable (choosing not to wear reminders of past relationships).
If your comment as a sort of way to go, "hey! don't let guys control you", then thanks! Some girls can be pushovers and date over bearing guys, but I assure you, I am not one of those girls!
Thank you for the conversation. It's given me the opportunity to have a candid discussion with my boyfriend about relationships and the compromises we make to make it a good one!
Your "Queen", eh? Sorry, that's just hysterical. It's funny that you feel like you have to size up to a person you haven't met. Males are so funny. Oh yes, you are sooo much better as a boyfriend because your "Queen" can do as she royally pleases! You are the MAN. :teeth:
It's not a question of sizing up, it just so happens I've called my various SOs my "Queen" for several years now. That's how they are supposed to be viewed and treated, and that's how I do it.
I'm glad you're great to your girlfriend. Many guys haven't figured that out. Maybe you haven't been burnt by a cheating ex, maybe you have and have come out just fine. However some are pretty affected by that type of experience.
I have indeed not been burnt by these things. I've been fortunate. I just find that possessiveness and jealousy, in general, is not favourable to good relationships. Just me.
If your comment as a sort of way to go, "hey! don't let guys control you", then thanks! Some girls can be pushovers and date over bearing guys, but I assure you, I am not one of those girls!
That was indeed my intent. I'm amazed at how much crap people are willing to put up with, and it was just a reminder that you're probably worth more than that (an assumption, since I don't know you).
I'm glad to hear you have it under control.
It was just a bit of advice from someone who does meet your definition of "man" (except for the family part. Don't have kids, don't want them).
I call it respect. I respect that a new boyfriend doesn't like to see what the old boyfriend got me. We all feel that way, jealousy is normal. I respect how the new boy feels so, I chose to not wear those things. Much easier to just boil it down to "he doesn't let me" than to sound cheesey about "respecting how he feels and not wanting him to feel uncomfortable". I think I can show sensitivity to my partner's feelings by doing something not asked for, as a display of my appreciation of them. Do I really need to keep wearing the tokens given to me by previous men that "stated their love", not really. Besides, rings get in the way of gloves and I do a lot of lab work.
As for secure/insecure, I'll take insecure. Overly confident men turn me right off. That attitude of "I"m God's gift to you" is just, ugh. That perfectly balanced blend of jealous/not too jealous doesn't exist.
Just because someone is secure about himself does not mean that he feels he's 'God's Gift'. I would much rather be with a secure man than an insecure man...I don't want to have to feel like I have to feed the ego just to keep someone happy. Plus, insecure is no fun in the bedroom.
As for the most romantic thing...not so much! We're going shopping in the States on Valentine's Day, and having a romantic meal at a casino buffet. Yummmmmmmmmmm!
Comments
I really need to put on some weight..
Phil
As for secure/insecure, I'll take insecure. Overly confident men turn me right off. That attitude of "I"m God's gift to you" is just, ugh. That perfectly balanced blend of jealous/not too jealous doesn't exist.
i'm not about to become a slave to a hallmark tradition.. and i'll apologize if i offend those who celebrate it..
i still remember in like grade 2 we made valentines cards in class
it was a big deal back then haha
To each his own.
Phil
Your "Queen", eh? Sorry, that's just hysterical. It's funny that you feel like you have to size up to a person you haven't met. Males are so funny. Oh yes, you are sooo much better as a boyfriend because your "Queen" can do as she royally pleases! You are the MAN. :teeth:
Secure and cocky, yup two different things. Too bad most guys don't know the difference. I'm glad you're great to your girlfriend. Many guys haven't figured that out. Maybe you haven't been burnt by a cheating ex, maybe you have and have come out just fine. However some are pretty affected by that type of experience.
In the end, it's about being sensitive enough to your partner to not being over bearing (such as letting your Queen do what she wants), to not making your partner uncomfortable (choosing not to wear reminders of past relationships).
If your comment as a sort of way to go, "hey! don't let guys control you", then thanks! Some girls can be pushovers and date over bearing guys, but I assure you, I am not one of those girls!
Thank you for the conversation. It's given me the opportunity to have a candid discussion with my boyfriend about relationships and the compromises we make to make it a good one!
I'm glad to hear you have it under control.
It was just a bit of advice from someone who does meet your definition of "man" (except for the family part. Don't have kids, don't want them).
Phil
As for the most romantic thing...not so much! We're going shopping in the States on Valentine's Day, and having a romantic meal at a casino buffet. Yummmmmmmmmmm!
you ruined my childhood idol... :cry: