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Do you think some relationships are out of convenience?
I mean it in the way, I'm sure you all know someone who jumps from relationship to relationship and is rarely ever single.
I used to be single for months and months on end or go on dates and never really be interested in any of the people. While I've had friends jump from short relationship to short relationship or even long relationship to long relationship
Do you think some people just are good for eachother, or is it out of convenience and they are settling for less cause they dont want to be alone, or is it just some people are too picky?
I used to be single for months and months on end or go on dates and never really be interested in any of the people. While I've had friends jump from short relationship to short relationship or even long relationship to long relationship
Do you think some people just are good for eachother, or is it out of convenience and they are settling for less cause they dont want to be alone, or is it just some people are too picky?
Comments
But my bf that Im with now, I absolutely love him. I would never treat him the way I did that guy.
I agree that some people jump from person to person cuz they dont want to be alone or bored or whatever. I went out with that guy simply because I hadnt dated a guy for over two months, so i was bored, lol. But usually, I dont jump from relationship to relationship all that often.
"two months" is a pretty short time, pretty similar time frame for one who jumps from relationship to relationship. If you call that long, I wonder how you would be hanging if it were two years instead
As for me, I'd be pretty ashamed of myself if it was actually in my nature to be able to bring my standards to such a low point that I would even go out with a loser, for whatever purposes
LOL, like i care what you think Furia. I dated him cuz I was bored, and yes, he WAS a loser. Did you know him? Didnt think so, so you have no idea if he was or not. And actually, me making sarcastic remarks at him was pretty funny. He was the loser for putting up with it!
Two months for me not hanging out with a guy is a long time since Im used to being around guys all the time. That doesnt necessarily mean DATING them tho. It had been two months since i had hung out with a guy, and no that does not mean having sex with him, cuz i know thats what you are prolly ignorantly assuming.
Hahahaha, you'd better go and catch your crowded smelly bus now. I'll be driving by you in my car on my way to school
!!
But anyway, after reading what you said, I couldn't help but think of those movies where a girl just treats a guy like shit, and the writers of the movie are obviously pointing to the fact that the girl is supposed to be a "bitch". Now, from what I read, maybe that's you, maybe it's not.
My point is, no matter how much you think somebody may deserve to be treated like that, don't you think it's wrong to fuck around with somebody's feelings like that? He's human, just like you, and he has feelings too. He feels sadness and shame, just like anybody else. Why would you degrade somebody like that just to amuse yourself (you said you dated him cause you were bored). Don't you think it's a little excessive and downright mean?
I'd tell you to turn the tables, but from previous conversations you seem unable to even begin to contemplate or understand anybody else's viewpoint. Like I said, I'm not attacking, I'm just wondering how anybody in good conscience could play with another person's emotions like that and not give so much as a damn to even feel slightly bad about it.
Magnificent Bastard: You did not know this guy. Yes, I dated him out of boredom. Perhaps you could call me a bitch, but other than poking fun at him a few times, i was pretty nice to him. I broke up with him for a reason that I will not specify, but trust me, it was worth breaking up with someone over. After I did that, his friends came forward and told me the most horrific things about him and told me that they were glad that I got out before he could do anything bad to me like he did to the other girls. God knows why they didnt tell me before i broke up with him, but thats not the issue.
So from my point of view, yes, he was a loser, and I am very very VERY glad that I am not with him anymore. I mean, my god, i can only imagine! I avoided a potentially awful situation from what im told. I even had his ex-gfs contact me and tell me things too. And all i can say is wowzers.
But i am quite done with him and dont really care to think or talk about him anymore. I merely brought him up because the boredom thing was mentioned. So what if i was bored? Its really my decision to choose to do whatever i like with my spare time. He was a time-filler is all.
So, you can call me a bitch if you want to, i wont be offended. I have been told that I have a bitchy look and attitude, but that once someone gets to know me, they realise that im not (well, not always, lol), so it really doesnt phase me. I am bitchy to some and sweet as candy to others. It really just depends on the person.
I probably messed it up last night though. We're nine years apart and it seems to have always bothered him, but I've never been phased by it. I'm used to dating older people so while it's a pretty substantial difference, it's not out of the ordinary. It's almost something that we don't talk about anymore (brings up some hostile conversation) but the past few months have been rocky and I was looking for answers. He has been busy with work and really hasn't made an effort to call when he says he will, see me more than once every two weeks, etc etc. I've been frustrated which I think is granted. ANYWAY, I confronted him about it a little and he called my comments 'ridiculous' and said I don't have legitimate accusations.
I have no idea what to do. I want this to go somewhere, but he just doesn't put in the effort and shuts me down every time I actually want to talk about something. The past few months have definitely been out of convenience on my end, just because I really didn't want to confront the situation.
How long have you two been together for?
Im sorry, but if he doesnt make the effort to see you more than once every two weeks, ditch him. You're honestly better off without him and there is someone out there who will want to see you everyday, not just once in a while. His excuse about work is barely an excuse at all. From what you're saying, you seem to be in the right here.
I know with my relationship, I can't NOT see my bf for more than a week, because frankly, I WANT to see him. Since I want to see him, I make the effort to go see him, not that he doesn't do the same. But you can't rely on him sometimes, you probably want to make some effort as well right?
But baby_e is right, if he doesn't make the effort, and you don't either (to see him, not the talking thing), then this relationship is going anywhere. You two both don't want to try, so nothing is going to happen! You can't really expect anything to happen. If you really want to talk to him about it, you hafta confront him / trap him in person, so he can't avoid what you say. But if he's avoiding... randomuser is right.
I've tried, on my end, to make this work. I've canceled plans for him, tried to get him to open up when he's had a bad day, but it just feels like there's absolutely nothing there anymore and I can't pinpoint any reason as to why this is the case.
Texted him last night and didn't answer. I guess I'll wait for him to be the man and end this for good.
I feel like I'm the person who's always wrong in this situation, but looking back on it I don't understand why.
on a serious note.. when a relationship hits to a point like this where he just doesn't care anymore.. start digging around.. he might be hiding something/someone.. =\
If my bf took off for a weekend without telling me, i would not be around when he got back, and he knows this. There are just certain things that gfs and bfs CANNOT do.
In your situation, it sounds like something is up on his end (as in, hes found someone new). You havent done anything wrong. Being concerned about him is not a bad thing, its actually a really nice and caring thing.
7 months and hes pulling that shit?!?? Ditch him! And dont wait for him to call you and break up with you, YOU should break up with HIM. Tell him you're done with him treating you like crap and that you want to go find someone who will treat you like a princess.
Please dont put up with that shit....i highly doubt that you deserve it. And i know u prolly love him and dont want it to end, but make a pros and cons list and see which one outweighs the other.
<3
and slaps illicit.. =P
I have a lot of thinking to do!
So if you saw a blonde girl crying on her phone around 5:30, that was me!
It's going to be hard because I as much as I want to talk to him, if only to say goodbye, I feel like I can't. Rough day.
Being nine years older, I thought his maturity would show itself in a situation like this. I guess not.
I just don't understand why he won't talk about it. Kind of has me thinking more and more about the possibility of someone else being in the picture, which makes me absolutely sick.
And hey, meesh, I think that she technically broke up with him because she said it first to him.
He was definitely doing something behind your back. He had to if he had an attitude like that.
Its hard but just remember that its prolly for the best. I know that you dont want to hear that, but its true. A loving bf would never just leave town without telling his gf where he is going and would NEVER get mad at you for being concerned about him.
Crappy time since finals are coming up, but just to concentrate on studying. God, hes not even MY bf and hes made me so mad cuz of his behaviour, lol.
But we learn something from every relationship we have, even tho we may wish that the relationship never happened in the first place. I know i have.