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Guys, how long would you wait for sex...

edited February 2007 in General
I'm not ready for sex yet. We've been casually dating for about a month now. Friends for a bit before.

He told me he would wait until I was ready, but if it was up to him, it would've been pants off by now. lol

I *totally* trust him that he's not have sex with girls behind my back. We see each other all the time

I am not ready to have to sex until he feels that he's ready to really date me.
HIs reasons for not being to ready to date me its because he's always been in a relationship and enjoys being single and not tied down. This was a month ago.

I feel that we have gotten closer and doesn't want to regard me as just as casual dater, but doesn't want to get labelled with a girlfriend

But guys how long would you wait before you say "Hasta La Vista blondie!"

Just a poll

Comments

  • edited January 2007
    Think about the kind of decision you want to make, having sex for the first time changes a person, and it will change your relationship with him once you do decide to have sex, if you decide for him to be the first one. (I'm assuming you havn't before).

    Regards to him, keep it going as long as you can, because if he would have had sex with you by now, maybe thats all he wants, so pay it safe and make sure that its not all that he wants. It seems like you guys are going good though, if you feel you've gotten closer then you're just gonna keep on getting closer. Try and see where that takes you.
  • edited January 2007
    omg, guess4life, you're on another website forum that im on. I remember you posted this topic there too. Hiiii!!

    Anyways, about your topic, he will wait until you're ready if hes a good guy. If he doesnt want to wait, then dont bother with him.
  • Pro
    edited January 2007
    he just wants a fuck buddy in my opinion.

    guess4life already knows he wants sex and they're not even in a relationship yet. he probably doesn't wanna be in one because he wants the freedom to do whatever he wants with no consequences. his excuses smells like BS cause if he really likes you then he would want to get into a relationship with you.

    to me it seems the only reason why he does seem to be waiting is that he is still single at the moment and right now he has nothing to lose. he could still be sleeping around with other girls behind your back and you don't know it. if you two were in a relationship and he still waits patiently for you, then you got a real keeper there.

    hey i might be wrong.. but as a guy myself.. unless you want a fuck buddy you should stay clear. or just fuck with his mind and make him think that he'll be getting some.. and then deciding no.. and keep him waiting
  • edited January 2007
    I don't think that it's unreasonable for you to want him to commit to you before you have sex! If that's the way that you feel, then stick to your opinion.

    If he doesn't want to date you before you have sex, it's doubtful he'll want to after! And I think it's crap about not wanting to be in a relationship because he's always been in one before. If the right person comes along, you'll want to be with them regardless of your past!
  • edited January 2007
    do whatever you want!
  • edited January 2007
    hey yall thanks for the input

    i asked a few of my guy friends, and they pretty much agreed but it kinda bugs me to know all guys just wanna have sex when theres so much more to things

    he does give me a lot of attention but how am i supposed to know its not gonna go away after we sleep together...i dunno

    ive just seen it happen to so many other girls that i dont want to be in that position and get hurt and regret it
  • edited January 2007
    dont want to play devil's advocate, but perhaps you might enjoy it and want it as well /shrug

    that being said, do what ur heart desires, dont get pressured into it :)
  • edited January 2007
    If you want him to commit, then make him wait. If he won't commit to you, then don't put out. Obviously you feel that way about things... just stick to it!

    And no, it's not what all guys want. Sure they think about it all the time, but men are a lot less obsessively sexual than society makes us believe. Just like women are a lot less virginal and pure!
  • edited January 2007
    my friend's gf says one year till she lets him have it.
    Frankly, my friend is her first bf. And I don't think my friend can wait that long. I wouldn't be surprised if he says "bye girlfriend" because of all the fights they've been having.

    this is somewhat off-topic but it would be a heart breaker if they've been going out for 11months and suddenly separate. =/
  • edited January 2007
    ahaha I like that she's got this random time in her head for when they can have sex.

    I waited for a while with my boyfriend too, but only because I was well aware how sex can ruin a relationship and I liked him too much for that. WORTH WAITING is all I can say. :wink:
  • edited January 2007
    i can waste haha... because I'm still single T.T

    anyhow... if he truly appreciates you, it doesn't matter if sex is involved or not right?
  • edited January 2007
    I'm a guy and I could wait for sex if it's for a girl I really liked. But my friend said he's dump a girl after 4 weeks if he could get some from her! Guess it depends on the guy...
  • edited January 2007
    i'd wait a long time... but of course i feel different than most guys do on this subject, lol.
  • edited January 2007
    Let's see how long he'll actually wait!! And we can take bets. :wink:
  • edited January 2007
    ok.. lets start betting..

    I say around a month
  • edited January 2007
    Honestly, and girls will probably think that I'm a jerk for saying this, I'd probably wait for 2-3 dates max...
    I have my needs and having sex doesn't mean that you like someone...

    I'm really pissed off at people saying that things change after you have sex, cos that's not true! just because people have sex, it doesn't mean that anything has changed =/ I don't know how to explain it, but does anyone get what I mean?

    I mean, just because I wanna have sex, and I don't wanna wait, doesn't make me a bad person and doesn't mean that I don't like the other person any less... does anyone get me?

    AND! if you think sex is gonna change stuff, why not just have sex to start off with and nothing will change :D j/k...

    There are loads of guys that are jerks and take people out just to have sex... I'm not one of em.. But the thing is, I can get sex someone else too, so if you're nothing special, I'm going :S

    So to answer your question; how special are you to this person? =)
  • edited January 2007
    yes i get you.. it doesn't make you a bad person.. but some girls have doubts.. and that's a sign that they aren't ready yet.. so instead of looking for girls who're not so sure of themselves.. you can always look for those that can and are willing satisfy your need.. it's a mutual understanding therefore after the sex.. nothing will change.. and most importantly no strings are attached..

    now don't get me wrong about suggesting you finding some with the hoes.. but i'm sure there are girls out there who wouldn't mind some casual sex.. i personally think that all guys want a nice girlfriend.. by nice i mean a good person by nature.. and those don't come around often.. in many cases.. good girls have values and demand respect.. so when it comes down to getting a "quality" girlfriend or just some random nights to spend with.. take your pick.. =)
  • edited January 2007
    I actually never waited for sex before, I always have sex with the girl before we start officially going out. It's good to get that out of the way. And once that happened, it means to start seeing her exclusively.
  • edited February 2007
    I'd wait about 5 minutes...
  • edited February 2007
    rawls-balls said:
    I'd wait about 5 minutes...
    ...and then the sex would be an additional 2 minutes on top of that. HAR HAR, I kid, I kid.

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