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Boyfriend + Communication - How much per day?
Basically, I find it difficult to not talk to my boyfriend, as in, to let him have his own space sometimes. I wouldn't say I am clingy or anything like that. I text him about 2/3 times a day. But I do call quite often, and sometimes he says to me ''we'll talk later'' [and only because he has a lot of work to do, understandably] and some reason I take offence by it. I really don't know why at all. My only explanation is that I love him so deeply, and intensively. I just think perhaps I am overdoing it. I know that I should perhaps let him initiate things with me first [as he does anyway sometimes], and then I'll know when he WANTS to talk! Perhaps it's not even an issue, but I'm just intrigued as to how long people talk/communicate with boyfriend for?
I think also, it's because i live on residence and he lives in the city, so we don't get to see each other all of the time. Anyway, I am going to stay round his for a few days soon, so I can be close then. I just like to know he's near, [bizarre!].
So guys, how much per day do you talk/communicate with your boyfriends? & Any tips on me calming it down?
I think also, it's because i live on residence and he lives in the city, so we don't get to see each other all of the time. Anyway, I am going to stay round his for a few days soon, so I can be close then. I just like to know he's near, [bizarre!].
So guys, how much per day do you talk/communicate with your boyfriends? & Any tips on me calming it down?
Comments
I have a lot of male friends and I can tell you that clingy girlfriends are the number one reason why guys will end a relationship. I know that your intentions are good and that you just want to be closer to him, but it may drive him away in the long term. I think you are aware of this, though, since you started the discussion!
You'll definitely want to give him some space. I think one phonecall a day is fair, unless you have some big news you can't wait to tell him! And same with text messages... they are nice to get, but not all the time.
You are getting offended by him not having the time to talk with you every time you phone. This is dangerous for two reasons: 1. You may actually have something important to say and he brushes you off because you've called so many times, and 2. You become angry because he doesn't want to talk to you, and he becomes annoyed because you want to talk all the time. Things like that drive a wedge in the relationship.
The best thing you can do is ASK HIM. Just say "I feel like I might be smothering you. What is a reasonable number of times to call/text you each day? And I want to give you the chance to call me sometimes too" I know it's been said so many times, but honesty is really key in a relationship. It's not a code to break, he wants to be happy with you as well... so ask!
i'd probably, " WEAN " off communicating with him, and if he consults/shows signs ( texts / calls you first ) then you can keep adding bit by bit.
i do things more of a mutal way rather than straight up answer.
But if you give a little too, by saying that you feel you may be calling too much, it opens him up to answer honestly!
Weaning him off without some kind of explanation is just going to confuse the poor guy and frustrate you too!
(Of course not everyone is the same and if your boyfriend is the type to freak at a direct question than it might not be the best approach!)
it's like going to the girl you like, or guy whatever, " WHAT IS OUR RELATIONSHIP ? "