To take part in discussions on talkSFU, please apply for membership (SFU email id required).

What do you think of someone who sleeps with..

edited March 2008 in General
You on the first date? I find that when it does happen with guys I lose all respect for them. Its just like "yeah I have to be up early tommorow morning...just press G to get to the main floor".

Ive never been able to get into relationships with guys I slept with on the first date, or even second even. Has anyone here ever had a relationship with someone they slept with right away?

Comments

  • edited February 2008
    randomuser;23315 said:
    You on the first date? I find that when it does happen with guys I lose all respect for them. Its just like "yeah I have to be up early tommorow morning...just press G to get to the main floor".

    Ive never been able to get into relationships with guys I slept with on the first date, or even second even. Has anyone here ever had a relationship with someone they slept with right away?
    Never ever ever everrrrr would I sleep with them on the first date.
    Not to sound harsh but it just reminds me of a one night stand.
    I lose all respect for guys that do this as well.
  • edited February 2008
    I mean I was an accomplice to this so it goes both ways, I've had guys call me back and want to see me still and other people we just went our separate ways...not like I do this all the time but its happened

    I just get so bored of them at that point, Im just curious as to whether it can work, like see them again and maybe youll see them as a decent person, Ive heard stories of some of my friends or friends of friends dating people they hooked up with too soon

    edit: and by dating them like LTR a few year relationship
  • edited February 2008
    Never have, and likely never will.
    I've always been really uptight when it comes to sex early on in the relationship though. Most of the time guys understand.
    It's also pretty fun to push the boundaries for a little while until someone breaks.
  • edited February 2008
    Depends on the girl. If she has sex on the first date because she wants to, then whatever. If she has sex on the first date because of some sort of desperation, low self-esteem, etc. then my opinion of her goes down. I don't like this attitude, that sex is like goal, and chicks are the goalie. And if you have sex, she has somehow 'lost' and he has somehow 'won.' It's stupid.

    Have sex whenever you're comfortable doing it. If that's two days in, so be it. If it's three months in, so be it as well. It's only bad if you do it before you're comfortable, because you're pressured, or afraid he'll move on, or what-have-you.
  • edited February 2008
    that whole girls are the goalie thing is like the basis of sexism when people call girls whores but guys players

    it totally goes both ways its like that game foozball? or whatever it is, thats a better analogy for sex
  • edited February 2008
    i'll probably laugh if i heard so and so did this over gossip.. and probably be disappointed if it was an acquaintance.. but i will flip/lose respect if a close friend of mine did.. and that goes for both guys and girls.. it's never a good thing to start off a relationship with sex.. cause you've just flied right through all the boundaries and limitations.. =\
  • edited February 2008
    What I don't like about girls sleeping with me on the first date (assuming they did) is that they most likely did the same with previous guys as well and view having sex as a small matter. That totally makes them cheap whores in my mind.
  • IVTIVT
    edited February 2008
    whores FTL
    don't forget the STDs!
  • edited February 2008
    shi2 as i mentioned before if you sleep with them on the first date then that makes you a guy that has probably slept with girls on the first date as well

    i honestly think its pretty close minded to say its wrong to sleep with people on the first date too, i think weve moved into an age were falsities implanted into your minds by the catholic church and various other sources can be disregarded.

    the only downside of sex too soon with people is of course the risk of STD's if you dont know them well, and not know their status, but thats totally up to two consenting individuals...and of course there is always protection

    its not something i personally like to do but i wouldnt judge others who do it, again my original proposition was is it possible or probable that a LTR can develop out of a one night stand
  • edited February 2008
    Randomuser is correct. I would like to subscribe to her newsletter.

    That said, I do think that a certain double-standard is not only justified, but necessary to fairly and accurately evaluate people's mental condition. Girls are biologically wired to put more emphasis on sex than guys, and so a girl sleeping around is a better indicator of emotional problems than is a guy sleeping around. It may not fit with the super-PC worldview in which men and women are identical, but it's true nonetheless.

    So, the problem with women who become sexual very quickly, aside of course from health concerns and pregnancy, is that it says a something about her emotional state. Most girls who jump into bed right away do so because they have low self-esteem. In these cases, I don't think labelling them as 'whores' is either compassionate, or accurate in its implications.

    If I meet a girl, and they are out there, who mentally approaches sex as does a male, who simply likes sex and wants sex, and isn't rushing into sex in order to ensnare a man or anything similar, then it's all good. It seems rather primitive, to me, to think of the vagina as some perishable item. Too many uses, and it goes bad? I think the modern feminists are idiots, yet even I think that's an appalling way of looking at it.
  • edited February 2008
    I have never slept with anyone on the first date. I really look down on those that do. If you can manage to get into a relationship with that person after, well good for you, but i just dont think its good to sleep with someone so fast.

    Sex is a very important thing to me, and if the guy is just willing to sleep with me right away, it really makes me question his character.
  • edited March 2008
    Wait... you say 'you don't respect people who sleep with you on the first date'?! what do you think the guy thinks - its not like its his doing or fault. you're both to blame. after all, YOU're sleeping with HIM on the first date too.

    don't do it. it sets expectations for the rest of the relationship, and your partner will emphasize the physical aspects of the relationship. this puts you on a bad footing for later on when the whole thing gets more serious, or when the physical side of things begins to subside.
  • edited March 2008
    she doesn't respect herself then...?! lol
  • edited March 2008
    dude, thats creepy Grinman.....

Leave a Comment