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To the ladies...

edited June 2007 in General
Would you date a guy who was 5'9 over a guy who was 6'2 if the 5'9 guy was slightly better looking?

I can't belive at 5'9 how much crap I get for being short. I'll be sitting at a bar, like today, and a girl says I'm cute and starts flirting. She's decent looking, but not a super model. When I stand up, she says, "oh well, I wish you were taller." Huh? Isn't Tom cruise 5'7????

Honestly, I can understand not wanting to go out with losers, fatties, pimple faced uglies, or even guys shorter than yourself. But since when did 5'9=too short to hook up with? I never really gave it much thought till this year, but I think I might just develop a Napoleon Complex.
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Comments

  • edited June 2007
    Chicks like to pretend like they care about stuff like height, but they really don't.

    Look at Colin Farrell, he drinks and smokes like a madman yet the SAME women that say "smoking and excessive drinking is bad" love him and say "he's so hawt I'd do him lol."

    Women are paradoxes. It'll always be that way.

    ;_;

    Just get rich and you'll be fine. Buy a wife. After all, women don't really love men for who they are but rather for what they have.
  • edited June 2007
    sadly that's mostly true... lol
  • edited June 2007
    JohnnyBoy;13297 said:
    Just get rich and you'll be fine. Buy a wife. After all, women don't really love men for who they are but rather for what they have.
    i beg to disagree.. wealth isn't what women look for.. after all what good is a man who has the money but not the brains.. pretty soon that wealth is gonna go down the dumps anyway.. =P but really... i don't think women would mind whether the guy is rich or not.. as long as he treats her well.. that's something money can't buy.. besides..you can date whomever you want and whatever you want.. because it's just dating.. finding a wife though is another issue.. you can date hot.. bitchy.. gold digging girls all you want.. but you certainly don't want that as a wife.. the same policy goes with the ladies..

    and no da_prodigy 5'9 is not too short to hook up with.. there's just this six foot craze going with the girls nowadays.. you hear it all the time.. and it's quality that counts not the height..
  • edited June 2007
    i'm 5'11 and i get it fine. but in general the principle is it has to be an older male and male has to be taller.

    but i think what ladies look for in a man (serious relationship ) is not necessarily wealth, but one with ambition and potential towards success, not some drop out with no plans. wealth is just an indicator of this such quality.
  • edited June 2007
    I have short and tall guy friends...I've dated both short and tall guys. I really don't care.
    So, either I'm not like some girls or that girl you talked to was a bitch (the latter sounds more likely)

    and, how tall was this girl? don't get all huffed up about, she's not worth the time.
  • edited June 2007
    im like 5'8 so i just find girls that are shorter than i am lol!
    i wish i was taller sure, but more so because i could play basketball better!! hah
    girls like me regardless ;)
  • edited June 2007
    I really think that the height thing is completely ridiculous. It is shallow and ignorant to find someone less desirable based on something they cannot change.

    Height has never, ever, factored into my choice of boyfriend. It has absolutely nothing to do with the stuff that matters like attitude, intelligence and ambition.

    Don't worry about it. That girl was a loser.
  • edited June 2007
    JohnnyBoy;13297 said:

    Just get rich and you'll be fine. Buy a wife. After all, women don't really love men for who they are but rather for what they have.
    I have to agree that a man's net worth and ownership of assets is an aspect that women consider when looking for a partner. Wealth will beat out height anyday.

    Men pick the women who is fairest of them all. So if you're concerned about your height, then find a woman who is not so fair and I'll guarentee she won't care about your height.
  • edited June 2007
    Intriguing points, maybe I should have one of those things at the PNE... must be this tall to ride ;)
  • edited June 2007
    da_prodigy;13328 said:
    Intriguing points, maybe I should have one of those things at the PNE... must be this tall to ride ;)
    too bad everyone knows the ride sucks :boy_hug:
  • edited June 2007
    中国男人;13325 said:
    Men pick the women who is fairest of them all. So if you're concerned about your height, then find a woman who is not so fair and I'll guarentee she won't care about your height.
    men who pick fair women don't have the intellectual capability to understand that beauty will wither.. what's he gonna do when that happens? and don't forget you aren't the only man out there wanting a fair women.. if you want one.. you have to learn to keep one.. =)
  • edited June 2007
    siuying;13373 said:
    men who pick fair women don't have the intellectual capability to understand that beauty will wither.. what's he gonna do when that happens? and don't forget you aren't the only man out there wanting a fair women.. if you want one.. you have to learn to keep one.. =)
    如何男人喜欢很美丽的女人?!Beauty doesn't wither for those women who know how to maintain their fairness over time. Don't forget that their are a lot of women out there that want a good man. I know what keeps a fair woman. Do you know what keeps a good man?
  • edited June 2007
    cry me a river, try being 5'9 AND pimplyfaced ooglay

    someone always have it worse than you. You can be 5'3-5'6. Too tall to be cute and well, too short...
  • edited June 2007
    lol i'm sorry but will u ppl get over yourselves???
    Nobody cares how tall u are.
    seriously, what does height have anything to do wid anything?
    There aren't many girls that really care about ur height, but if u come across them often, then u gota change up where u meet ppl.... because obviously ur looking for us [ ;) ] in the wrongg places, and i duno, maybe these types of superficial girls like to concentrate in certain places in the universe, i duno.
    anywayss...... i don't know what ur complaining about in the first place because 5 9' isn't even short.
  • edited June 2007
    中国男人;13381 said:
    如何男人喜欢很美丽的女人?!Beauty doesn't wither for those women who know how to maintain their fairness over time. Don't forget that their are a lot of women out there that want a good man. I know what keeps a fair woman. Do you know what keeps a good man?
    ahh.. i hear the sarcasm there.. lol.. well first of all.. i'm a female so i'm pretty sure i have a good idea whether beauty withers or not.. maybe you and i have a different perspective in what is beauty.. =) second.. good for you for knowing what keeps a fair woman.. i'm sure your intelligence will help you make sure she's one worth keeping.. thirdly.. i'm not looking for a good man.. =P

    toodles..
  • edited June 2007
    Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. It is so subjective.

    I agree and disagree that beauty doesn't wither. if external beauty was all there is, then a lot of marriages would have no chance of lasting, let alone relationships. I agree there has to be some physical chemistry between two people, but there HAS to be something intangible that binds them together, and that's something that even Botox can't do.
    Yet I don't think beauty necessarily withers over time, depending on how you see beauty. For me, I think some people become more beautiful as they grow older, but I don't know...that's just me.
  • edited June 2007
    siuying;13305 said:
    i beg to disagree.. wealth isn't what women look for.. after all what good is a man who has the money but not the brains.. pretty soon that wealth is gonna go down the dumps anyway.. =P but really... i don't think women would mind whether the guy is rich or not.. as long as he treats her well.. that's something money can't buy.. besides..you can date whomever you want and whatever you want.. because it's just dating.. finding a wife though is another issue.. you can date hot.. bitchy.. gold digging girls all you want.. but you certainly don't want that as a wife.. the same policy goes with the ladies..
    I much protest your begging to disagree. Wealth is by far the principal criterion above all others that women look for. This is really why women want guys to commit and not come and go. It's entrenched in our biology: women as child bearers need support and since they cannot depend on themselves while pregnant, need to be financially dependent on men, at least temporarily. For a guy, it absolutely doesn't matter how you look, how tall you are, or even--to an extent--how you treat her.

    Here's some food for thought: nine out of ten domestic disputes (with a man hitting a woman) that get reported to the police end up with the woman insisting that nothing serious be done to her man and that the man not be arrested or charged. Why? Because she ultimately needs him. I'm not saying that he can do without her; merely, these are traits rooted in things we cannot have control over--our biological predispositions.

    Of course a guy has to treat a woman right, but many women are willing to significantly overlook this (and the guy's looks and perhaps personality) simply for the sake of having that financial support from a man.

    Things such as height, intellect, and status are supposed to be indicators of the man's wealth. However, being tall and smart does not always mean you will be rich as a man. Hence, these indicators are merely artificial.

    Sure you can say that in a progressive society such as Canada's, the feminist movement and all that jazz, these things are not as characteristic of our society. I say that that may be true to a minute degree; overwhelmingly, however, what I stated above about wealth and attractiveness is axiomatic.

    P.S.: I know I'll get a lot of heat for saying what I said and perhaps some will say that I'm a male chauvinist or that I'm overly conservative; in any case, I'm prepared to take it. But please, rather than taking this personally and making judgements about my worth as an individual, I ask you to merely assess the validity of what I said objectively and nothing more.

    P.P.S.: Height is at best modestly relevant to attractiveness . . . . . stop thinking about height and start thinking about wealth and success and how to make it in this world. However, all other things being equal, height does make a difference.
  • edited June 2007
    illicit;13307 said:
    i'm 5'11 and i get it fine. but in general the principle is it has to be an older male and male has to be taller.

    but i think what ladies look for in a man (serious relationship ) is not necessarily wealth, but one with ambition and potential towards success, not some drop out with no plans. wealth is just an indicator of this such quality.
    I would say you're half right: ambition and the potential for success are indicators of wealth, not the other way around. See, one will have ambition and potential before one becomes wealthy. Hence, ambition and potential precede wealth and in that sense, they may lead to it or they may not. A man who is wealthy will have had ambition and potential (or perhaps still has them). In that sense, guys dating younger girls means that they have had some time to become successful or substantiate their potential or ambition.

    And yes, I agree with the principle you stated.
  • edited June 2007
    JohnnyBoy;13297 said:
    Chicks like to pretend like they care about stuff like height, but they really don't.

    Look at Colin Farrell, he drinks and smokes like a madman yet the SAME women that say "smoking and excessive drinking is bad" love him and say "he's so hawt I'd do him lol."

    Women are paradoxes. It'll always be that way.

    ;_;

    Just get rich and you'll be fine. Buy a wife. After all, women don't really love men for who they are but rather for what they have.
    The truth has been spoken, not much more that can be said.
  • edited June 2007
    siuying;13430 said:
    ahh.. i hear the sarcasm there.. lol.. well first of all.. i'm a female so i'm pretty sure i have a good idea whether beauty withers or not.. maybe you and i have a different perspective in what is beauty.. =) second.. good for you for knowing what keeps a fair woman.. i'm sure your intelligence will help you make sure she's one worth keeping.. thirdly.. i'm not looking for a good man.. =P

    toodles..
    I thought you were a guy all this time. It was quite odd that this dude knew what a woman wants. Perhaps we have different perspectives of a beautiful woman and a handsome man. In any case I find your three points quite revealing. I think you are looking for a guy.
  • edited June 2007
    Insatiable;13440 said:
    I would say you're half right: ambition and the potential for success are indicators of wealth, not the other way around. See, one will have ambition and potential before one becomes wealthy. Hence, ambition and potential precede wealth and in that sense, they may lead to it or they may not. A man who is wealthy will have had ambition and potential (or perhaps still has them). In that sense, guys dating younger girls means that they have had some time to become successful or substantiate their potential or ambition.

    And yes, I agree with the principle you stated.
    Guys dating younger girls is another aspect that a man's height can be overlooked. It is well known and observed throughout all cultural boundries that younger women will choose an older man. However this pairing is being altered by the feminists you speak of. It is becoming apparent that older women are pursuing younger men. Women are making the first move and face rejection from a man. In this special case I assume that the woman would like to be taller than her man.... LOL
  • edited June 2007
    I dont like old hags...

    I know it's not fair. For me, it is weird that a 40 year old guy can date a 18 year old girl. But, it's is much more weird when i see a 40 year old lady is dating a 18 year old guy. O.o
  • edited June 2007
    I think that if some women choose men based on how well they can support their family (financially), there are others who choose men for emotional support, or other reasons.

    To be honest, I don't think that women and men make drastically different choices when looking for partners. I just think that women are better at disguising their lust, and men are better at disguising their need for support.
  • edited June 2007
    Malakaiii;13446 said:
    I think that if some women choose men based on how well they can support their family (financially), there are others who choose men for emotional support, or other reasons.

    To be honest, I don't think that women and men make drastically different choices when looking for partners. I just think that women are better at disguising their lust, and men are better at disguising their need for support.
    Interesting take on the issue.

    There may be women who choose men primarily for emotional support, but this is certainly not in the majority of cases.

    As for disguising, you make a fair point. Would you, however, say that women have the same amount of lust as men? Alternatively do men have the same amount of need for financial support as women? Are any differences negligible?
  • edited June 2007
    toast;13444 said:
    I dont like old hags...

    I know it's not fair. For me, it is weird that a 40 year old guy can date a 18 year old girl. But, it's is much more weird when i see a 40 year old lady is dating a 18 year old guy. O.o
    How about a rich 40-year-old woman dating an 18- or 20-year-old guy. Not so out of the ordinary when you consider than many men would do this for financial support.
  • edited June 2007
    I like you, Insatiable, you don't let people get away with talking out of their asses. Well done! :smile:

    Since I AM a woman, I would say that women in general have just as much lust as men do. However, due to hormonal differences (as well as cultural ones), they are not as aggressive with their desires. Believe me, many women date very hot guys who are idiots and broke. And others will talk about men simply in the "I'd sure like to fuck that" category, just as men do. Think about it: a man who gets lots of chicks is a stud, while a woman who gets lots of guys is a slut. It's no wonder women playdown their sexuality.

    As far as men being needy, I was referring to both financial and emotional support. I'm sure there are other girls who can agree with me that there have been boyfriends who have cried when you relationships have ended. And I've had male friends in physically and emotionally abusive relationships who stayed because he "loves her". And men need financial support too. I just read the other day that more and more men are choosing to stay home with their children, while the mother works. Judging from conversations with my male friends, this is a switch that a lot of men are looking forward to! I think it's great to have the opportunity to work it out within your own family how you would like to organize your lives instead of just conforming to outdated social norms. So there ARE men who would like to find a woman who can support them financially, just as you give in your response to older rich women dating younger guys.

    As far as saying what is the "majority of cases", what's your basis? Friends, the media, psychological studies? It seems like the media wants us to think that men and women fit into these neat (and separate) boxes, which I don't think is accurate at all.

    And like anything pertaining to human nature, it's probably waaay more complicated than we know, and it's difficult to pin down with definite answers. Isn't psychology fun? :wink:
  • edited June 2007
    Malakaiii;13455 said:
    I like you, Insatiable, you don't let people get away with talking out of their asses. Well done! :smile:
    Thank you, and I'm certain we both know who talksfu's coolest moderator is :wink:
    Malakaiii;13455 said:
    Since I AM a woman, I would say that women in general have just as much lust as men do. However, due to hormonal differences (as well as cultural ones), they are not as aggressive with their desires. Believe me, many women date very hot guys who are idiots and broke. And others will talk about men simply in the "I'd sure like to fuck that" category, just as men do. Think about it: a man who gets lots of chicks is a stud, while a woman who gets lots of guys is a slut. It's no wonder women playdown their sexuality.
    A very bold statement. I find it hard to accept considering differences in male and female biologies and predispositions, but ultimately, the statement does have validity.
    Malakaiii;13455 said:
    As far as men being needy, I was referring to both financial and emotional support. I'm sure there are other girls who can agree with me that there have been boyfriends who have cried when you relationships have ended. And I've had male friends in physically and emotionally abusive relationships who stayed because he "loves her". And men need financial support too. I just read the other day that more and more men are choosing to stay home with their children, while the mother works. Judging from conversations with my male friends, this is a switch that a lot of men are looking forward to! I think it's great to have the opportunity to work it out within your own family how you would like to organize your lives instead of just conforming to outdated social norms. So there ARE men who would like to find a woman who can support them financially, just as you give in your response to older rich women dating younger guys.

    As far as saying what is the "majority of cases", what's your basis? Friends, the media, psychological studies? It seems like the media wants us to think that men and women fit into these neat (and separate) boxes, which I don't think is accurate at all.
    It may be harder to believe in today's day and age, but men are still viewed as providers and hence the pressure is on them to succeed; coversely, women are viewed as child bearers and the emphasis is on them to stay home and take care of the kids. I'm not making a normative statement but a factual one. Whether or not these traditional gender-roles are good or bad is a discussion for another day.

    I'll certainly agree that there are women who work and men who stay home and take care of the kids (i.e. non-traditional roles). However, such instances are still in the minority. Perhaps the unconventional may be proliferating, but we are still in a society with moderately traditional gender-roles. Or at the very least, the gender roles considered traditional are still dominant enough to be traditional.
    Malakaiii;13455 said:
    And like anything pertaining to human nature, it's probably waaay more complicated than we know, and it's difficult to pin down with definite answers. Isn't psychology fun? :wink:
    It's certainly far more complicated than I'd like, but that's a fact of life we'll have to deal with. There are no definite answers and a theory (one that is based on general trends) will never be able to accommodate for every instance. We humans are not always so simple to categorized under one theory.

    Psychology has the potential for being fun, but many classes certainly are not.
  • edited June 2007
    I think the most complicated part about psychology is that our brain has to try to understand how the human brain works. It's a conundrum in itself!

    I don't disagree with anything you said in that latest post. Cheers for the mini-debate! :wink:

    And if you're curious, here's a link for the article on stay-at-home-dads.
  • edited June 2007
    trying to understand how to understand things?

    Sounds fun already....
  • edited June 2007
    中国男人;13442 said:
    I thought you were a guy all this time. It was quite odd that this dude knew what a woman wants. Perhaps we have different perspectives of a beautiful woman and a handsome man. In any case I find your three points quite revealing. I think you are looking for a guy.
    lol..well then as revealing as it is.. go knock yourself out..=)

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